Ruth on the double decker bus



Fresh food in the Berlin train station. Man, look at all that cabbage. If you ate all that, you'd probably live forever.

This shirt cost the equivalent of $90 in the U.S. I don't even know what it means.




This T-shirt is the equivalent of $75. Notice it's in English. The father of the person buying this were the ones that "the ugly American" was named after. After the revolution, as Patrick would say, this person will be in front of a cart plowing my field.




Fresh juice bar, also in the Berlin train station.

Ruth doing her makeup in a sign reflection

this made me think of ya, Lara, if you're reading this






subway art. Pretty daring, I'd say, for something hanging in a sandwich shop.



this dog could be Sandoz's twin. I wrote earlier that she looked like Tang, but I think more like Sandoz. Not the first dog I've seen who was so strikingly similar either. That phenotype must run really strong in nem doags.

Berlin

In memoriam, these plaques are outside of a home where these victims of the holocaust had lived.



Generic German bike



Ruth and I ate at this market, where we figure we'd get something authentically German. The guy couldn't speak English, so we pointed in our mouths, and rubbed our stomachs, and he just looked alarmed. We continued to ask, pointing in our mouth and licking our lips and going MMMMMM! and he just spit on the ground, and pointed at it. I think he was saying that he didn't think the food we has serving wasn't very good, but while we admired his honesty, we figured if it's good enough for the Germans, it's good enough for us, and we just licked our lips some more and said MMMMMM! until he finally served us up some. i have to admit, it was really gross. It was just a big bowl full of this bubbly, slimy, snotty liquid that tasted slimy and snotty. really bad. I'm shocked that the Germans can stomach that stuff. Oh well, like they said in Anchorman, "when in Rome!" and like they said on that show Diff'rent Strokes, "what may be right for you might not be right for some," and "whatchu talkin' 'bout, Pearl?"

I'm just kidding. This is where the savvy German shopper gets the very best deals on spittle! We knew it all along. Either way, we walked away realizing two things: the stuff tastes really gross, and Diff'rent Strokes is really a great show.



Mercedes, rising up like a Phoenix after the bombings of WWII.

Erotik Museum, Berlin

This is the first sculpture of a man that doesn't depict his, er, flugelhorn, as all shriveled up. Man, what are people so afraid of? We see images of women constantly, everywhere we turn, and this is the first time Ruth or I had seen any depiction of a man aroused. Big deal, eh? Come on, guys. Let's give something back to the ladies who put up with depictions of women's er, funbags, all over the place 24 hours a day. Let's stop being so freaked out. No wonder Ruth took about 47 pictures. Until our wedding night, she had probably never seen such a thing. Poor girl, how fair is that?




This is the description of Courbet's "Origin du Monde" or the "origin of the world." Indeed. I guess it caused a big stink for being obscene, which is fricking ABSURD. It's the most normal thing in the world, and again, perverse that we're so warped and out of touch with who, and what we are, that we think this is obscene. I will admit, I'm not sure I understand what it's doing at the erotic museum, but I applaud that he made it.



Courbet's painting.




Tile work in the Berlin subway. It looks Navajo (wait, Navaho or Navajo?), but either way I think the Germans are onto something by having artwork up and not bare.


Petruvian energy drink

berlin's erotic museum, etc.

turka cola


run cool



this guy is supposed to be a biblical figure. I honestly can't remember who he's supposed to be. I will say though, that it's very perverse, and obscene...


that showing a person in their natural state is so taboo. If the gods had wanted people to be nekkid, they would have had them born that way. And besides, isn't that unrealistic? Shouldn't that thing be more like half the size of my pinky?



Incredibly unrealistic, as I mentioned. Maybe if it they were more like stubby pencils, it could be believable. I guess that's why Ruth took so long in that area, checking out this bizarre version of what humanity "might" look like.





this could be Tang's long lost sister. What a beautiful animal.

everything's backwards over there


This cat was just jamming out in Vienna. These guys are all over the place. Europe's lousy with 'em.

tile roof in vienna. pretty sweet.




ruth makes friends all over



probama graffiti in vienna


not to be outdone, picasso gets in on the act



nightmares

This last one is made from real teeth. Just the teeth part, silly.

Masks from the "masks" exhibit in vienna. There were hundreds and hundreds. The variety was crazy. really impressive exhibit.

Berlin to Krakow

Scenes from the Erotika Museum:







a real skin flute





From there we wandered around and rode a couple of buses and trains in seach of a bar called the Kit Kat Klub, only to find it was closed and at a further location than we had thought. We milled around the city, sightseeing and what not. We stopped at a grocery store and ate tomatoes and cream-filled cookies. When it came time to get back to the main train station though, we were shocked to find a lot of the rails were down and we had to rely on a few people's help to take the right way back. The roundabout way back took us so long that we nearly missed our train to Poland! We ran through the station at top speed, up and down stairs with our heavy packs only to make it on the platform with two minutes to spare.






The night ride started out hopeful because we had a 2nd class cabin to ourselves and were able to stretch out on either side. But after a few stops people started pouring onto the train. Two polish middle-aged women came into our cabin and we got up to make room. We had been sleeping but when they sat down they starting chatting their asses of very noisely! After a few minutes one lady decided she'd rather have her luggage on a seat than on the floor, so she sat up and lifted her suitcase onto the seat she was sitting on, then stepped over and sat right on my feet! I had them resting on the seat across from me the whole time! The act was clearly purposeful. It hurt actually, and I uttered an "oh!" to which she responded by yelling at me in Polish. Rude, rude, rude. Seriously. Because I couldn't understand her, I stuttered an "I'm sorry...?" and moved my legs onto Jack. Later on while my eyes were shut (they probably assumed I was sleeping) the other one mimicked me and started in Polish and snickering. It was clear they were talking about me. I was awfully exhausted from being up all night and I didn't have the energy to call them out, so kept on trying to sleep. In the wee hours of the morning the one who sat on my foot wouldn't move over to give Jack more leg room. I swore that if they pulled any more rude shit I would yell at them and tell them they were mean, old bobchas...

no sin in berlin

In Berlin we scoped out the Erotika Museum, which was surprisingly high-brow. It is a three-story building that exhibits sexual artifacts - paintings, sculptures, etc - from many cultures over many time periods. It also had many interactive displays and presentations about general sexual knowledge, differences in male & female anatomy, etc. It was very interesting and fun.





MY FIRST TWO-TIER BUS!!